Brian "Head" Welch (formerlly of Korn) speaks at Victory Life Church

By Ann Michels
Editor

There is absolute truth in the passage from Brian "Head" Welch`s book, "To Hell and Back. " After hearing his story in Battle Creek`s Victory Life Church on January 22nd, it is a miracle he was able to come back. His story started in a Bakersfield, California (known for corn, there's even a street named Corn Row). Welch had a typical childhood in the eighties, middle-class family life in a ranch-style house in a small town. With limited amounts of choices to entertain young Brian, (sports, fighting, or music) he admits he threw "like a girl," he couldn`t fight, so he found music. He loved everything about music, loved how it made him feel, the melodies. He was just drawn to it. He would be lost in music for hours. Why metal music? It must have been a "guy thing" the whole rocker scene, long hair and attire. "Except for theeighties, when they dressed like a girl." Laughter erupted in the sanctuary. Welch knew he wanted to be a rock star before he started playing the guitar.

By high school, he had dabbled in watching porn, drug use, family cat cruelty, and stealing. Some of this behavior stemmed from getting picked on throughout school. He would eventually form friendships with some of the other future members of Korn. As many other "Rock Star" hopefuls, they didn`t find the right chemistry in the first band attempts. It was not until 1993, the now infamous metal band Korn formed with Brian "Head" Welch as their guitarist. Welch and the other members knew they had "the sound", Welch's term; they would be "Gigantor."

They realized they made it big when they each received a $40,000 check, when they were signed. While another member splurged on a Mercedes, Welch thought he would hold on to his money for a while. An instant 40K is a lot of cash for a bunch of guys who were working at Pizza Hut. They became really big by their fourth tour, with gold record stardom. On one occasion, Korn opened for Ozzy Osbourne, Welch recalls his rock star idol hobbling down the hallway between acts, Sharon Osbourne interpreting Ozzy's signature speaking style. To go from having posters of Ozzy Osbourne to actually opening for him was the "rock star" dream finally realized. It seemed so surreal at the time, drinking beer on the tour bus with money flowing in like water.

However, after months/years onthe road, away from their families, "I don`t want to be a whinyrock star or anything." exclaimed Welch. The rock star life was not as glamorous as it seemed. Life on theroadtouring put a mentaland physical strainonfamilylife. Even though the good times werecuddly and lovey, thebadtimeswere horrible.Whenereturnedhome,onmany occasions it wouldturn abusive with histhen ignificantother, Rebekah,whoultimately became his wife. In a fits of rage during drug use, both might end up bloodied or ruised. During that time, the drugs (speed, meth, coke, and/or alcohol) also flowed like water.


Guitarist Brian "Head" Welch (formerly of Korn)
Photo by Ann Michels

The band's popularity kept growing and growing, nominations for Grammy Awards, MTV awards, and countless record sales. Although the fame was great, Welch said, "It was like a constant party that kind of got boring." He and other band mates used to refer to everyday as Ground Hog Day (like the movie). It would repeat over and over again. Woke up in the afternoon, ate dinner, played show, partied to the wee morning hours, and repeat the next day.

This lifestyle couldn't keep Welch`s family intact. Struggling with her own addictions, Rebekah, had a hard time living the "rocker widow" role, alone with their baby, Jennea, she couldn't handle being married to Welch any longer. While on one of the countless tour, Welch received the news, she was leaving him. Devastated with the loss of their dysfunctional relationship, instead of sobering up, he spiraled into a deeper depression and harder drug use.

After the band's fourth album "Follow the Leader", many of them went through divorces, settlements, and broken homes. "Hard time for the band, many of us had gone off the deep end, partying and it was pretty scary," said Welch. "One of the band members had a mansion and he was in full-on party mode. Non-stop pills, weed, everything and then there was the singer that went through a dark time and he was suicidal…. he was drinking his own vomit out of the toilet at night" to get the alcohol back in his system.

Doctors and dentists would party with the band, prescription pills anything you wanted. "One guy worked for the ER, and he had this pharmaceutical, cocaine, ecstasy and stuff, he was like I`ll do some more lines, but I have to be at the ER at 9 am. was going like; you're going to work on people after this, you're crazier than me'… we were in a world where we could do whatever we wanted, but it was a free ticket to Hell," Welch said.

Welch went on a two-year drug binge, every day for over 600 days. He was a drug addict, and his friends in the band didn't even realize it. He smuggled drugs into many countries during his European tour. "Only God can make you realize that is crazy…" Welch said. "The whole time I was scared, I have never done this much dope in my life….part of me was like, I want to die….I could die like one of those rock stars, once they die they are put on a pedestal….I've got to get clean for my daughter, it was like up and down."
When he returned from a tour, his daughter would ask, "Who's Jesus…Who`s God, Daddy?" She was going to a Catholic church with Welch`s aunt. At five years old, (Christmas 2004) she mentioned it was Jesus's birthday, "Can we buy this birthday cake?" Christmas came and went. Brian forgot about the cake until he came down from a speed high and needed sugar. He remembered the cake started to eat it, then recalled and said, "Happy Birthday, Jesus." He guessed it had to be a Jesus cake because two weeks later he was saved.


Once he started to go to church, he felt a peace there. His first experience felt weird to him after being on drugs and up for three straight days. "The pastor was so cool, he was real." Welch couldn`t believe how he got the job, after his testimony revealed a dark past he had before accepting Christ into his life. The pastor seemed really sincere and with a congregation of 10,000 members, Brian figured he was the real deal. So, when he returned home amidst all of his drugs lined up in his closet, he started praying like he had been praying for twenty years to take the garbage out of his life. He wanted to quit, but couldn't. His prayer started "Just take this stuff from me, or I'm gonna die. Please get this stuff from me….after praying that prayer, like 30 minutes, my phone rang….I was tweaked out so I didn't answer it …but the machine was like 'beep', hey this is Doug, it was an old friend. When I first tried drugs, he was there, 'God totally saved me, I heard you came to my church.' …I just prayed that, I was like…this is trippy," thought Welch.

After experiencing comfort through following Christ, he desired a better life for him and his daughter; he has been clean and sober ever since. He finally found a higher power to fill the emptiness he felt for so many years. His life has taken a dramatic turn from the "rock star" days. He announced his departure from Korn early in 2005. In a decision to have a clean start he dedicated his life to Jesus Christ, was baptized in the Jordan River with other members of his hometown church in Bakersfield, California. Welch currently travels around the world giving his testimony. Welch is still recording music, just with a different content. His first book, Save Me from Myself, is a New York Times best seller. His second book is just as powerful as the first, Stronger.

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